April 25, 2012-Volume 66: Is it possible to create something new when you are getting old: Middle Age and Good Ideas

The Adventures of the Blind/Low Vision/Visually Impaired (BLOVI) Girl- Volume 66: Is it possible to create something new when you are getting old: Middle Age and Good Ideas

I have lots of great ideas in my head, or at least I think they are great. I have ideas on how to improve existing things and start new things. I have ideas about how to bring organizations together in collaboration and ideas to start some truly unique programs as well as businesses. And I think I have the energy to help implement new ideas. But the bigger issue is gaining momentum through things I do not have; money, power and influence. So in this blog I muse about creating new things in the second phase of my life.  But first………………..

My WTF of the week is the fact that my sinuses are already out of control because of the crazy pollen and weather fluctuations. My allergies and sinus problems usually don't begin until later in the year; as it gets hotter, I have more problems. But this year I started in March.  I did not develop allergies until about 10 years ago, which was 11 years after moving to Columbia.  I am convinced that everyone who lives or moves here will eventually have allergies. I have had people even visit me for a few days that say they are stopped up or blowing their nose the whole time they are here, but have no problems where they live. So Columbia is not only famously hot but famously allergy producing. I am naming it Famously Snot. It is a telling thing when you continually pray for rain to wash pollen away. Thank goodness I have a rain dance.

This week I can’t get enough of the TED website. As you may have noticed, I am mentioning things I saw on TED frequently. That is because I watch two or three Ted talks a day. I find them completely fascinating and inspiring. Lately I am watching videos on DNA and genetics and human lineage and also on social relationships and global health and economics. I feel really informed after watching a TED video, much like I feel after watching the Kahn Academy. And TED has led me to new books or research articles. Most importantly it inspires me to learn and explore or try out new ideas.  I have been watching the TED prize winners and really want to bring a model that Dave Eggers won the TED prize for in 2008 to Columbia.  It is TED that has led me to start thinking about all the things I wish I could implement or study.

This leads me to the focus of the blog. Are innovative ideas and the energy to implement them reserved for the young?  I was reading a Malcolm Glad well book and he had a chapter on late bloomers; those that are most creative and produce their best work in middle age or later.  I am not sure if I am one of these. I have always had a mind filled with ideas and in my earlier years would get up in the middle of the night to write things down and come up with new models and theories, none of which ever went anywhere. In my 20’s I was a good starter, but could never see things through. I had no patience.  Then there came the years of working 60 hours a week growing a business when there was only time to create what I was paid for. Then came the fog years of pregnancy and having an infant and toddler.  Then came a change in career and then came the accident.  Through the years of work and worry and sometimes, chaos, my mind had some ideas in it, but was mostly filled with getting through the day. 

In the last few months something has shifted and my brain is awash in new thoughts and ideas. Maybe it is because I have space for them or created space for them. Maybe it is because things have been more stable in my home life. Maybe it is because I have more energy. Maybe it is because I stopped the outward creative expression of dance and music and have again turned inward to the work of my brain, a scary but always interesting place.  Whatever the case, my brain is awake and active and has a need for me to feed it with new information. So lots of reading nonfiction and research is taking place. I am connecting pieces I know with the new things I learn to crate a web of interconnections. I feel compelled not so much to write, but to do.  The program I have latched onto is the one Dave Eggers won the TED prize for in 2008, Once Upon a School and I want to bring that model to Columbia. After watching him talk about the model I thought, we need that here.  In short it is a tutoring center housed in a retail space that has a storefront that is typically something really cool.  In San Francisco they have a pirate store and in Brooklyn it is a Superhero store. Tutoring takes place at the site and the tutors and mentors also go into the schools. Some of the focus has been on writing and creative expression, but it can be broader. I have an idea for the storefront that would combine artistic and creative expression into the tutoring aspect.  I can actually visualize the whole thing in my head.  It is not the first time I have visualized a program or project that I think is really cool and impactful, but it is the first time I have had the balls to think that maybe I can make this happen. And the change is that I am older and wiser. I have more patience to see things through and more understanding of the huge role relationships and marketing play when selling something new. What I lack is money to do it myself.  But the model in other cities has been run by volunteers and the money has come from the retail part. What I also lack is influence. But, being rooted here these 21 years means I do know many people and some of those people have money, power and influence.

For me, it is possible to have new and creative and great ideas in middle age and have the energy to do them. It is possible because, in middle age, I better understand the world and how it works, have patience, and have the confidence and courage to believe I can change the world. I think 20 years ago I could have never created an idea or project and stewarded it through to its fruition and done it well. It is never too late to try something new, take risks or go out on a limb. Remember, your tree is now deeply rooted.

Keep Moving Forward,

Beth (BLOVI) Medlock

April 13, 2012-Volume 65: Trying to be Connected in a Sighted, but Disconnected World

The Adventures of the (Blind/Low Vision/visually Impaired (BLOVI) Girl-Volume 65: Trying to be Connected in a Sighted, but Disconnected World

Recently two things I read and saw caused me to think about how I interact with people differently now that I am visually impaired, and how that acting differently makes me different. First, after reading some literature on the importance of reading people through facial expressions and the importance of searching someone’s eyes, I began  reflecting on how I miss cues because I cannot see facial expression and how that impairs me in social interactions when I want to connect. The second thing that really got me thinking is a TED lecture I saw on how we are becoming more disconnected because of social media and texting and how younger people do not know how to have a conversation. Because I text very slowly and do not have a smart phone and only really use Facebook sparingly, my preference is to pick up the phone and call people and have conversations. I am becoming aware that this is not the norm and I cannot imagine what it would be like if I relied on texting and e-mailing. My general reflections about connectedness and communication and doing so as a visually impaired person in a very visually driven world, is the focus of this blog.  But first……………………….

My WTF of the week is the fact my computer had the unfortunate experience of contracting a Trojan virus. The whole thing started when it began shutting certain programs down, and eventually it would not let me on the internet. I made problems worse by shutting down and restarting my computer about 20 times, winch I am sure the virus really enjoyed. On the third day I took it to Staples and the guy said that it looked like a Trojan virus. To which I said, “That was not the type of Trojan I wanted to be dealing with”. For some reason he did not think this was funny. Much chaos happened with my computer at Staples because there were two techs who failed to communicate when they handed off my computer so I had to step in and communicate for them when what should have taken one day took three. After they had it three days and still did not have my computer back running what it needed at the start up, I rescued it and had a friend come over who fixed it in 5 minutes. The good thing is that I now have all of my data backed up on a massive external hard drive and very powerful anti-virus software, which I should have had in the first place to protect my computer. Why didn't they call the virus protection Trojan-that would have made more sense.

This week I can’t get enough of my new hot pink electric tricycle Ped E Cab.   Now that it is getting hotter, I can’t just run everywhere and I also need to cut down on using drivers. I also needed something I could tote my daughter around on safely as she seems to have a problem with walking, or riding in the jogging stroller, or riding a bike. So I went on the Internet looking at all these cool quadricycles and adult trikes. I also went to Outspokin on Devine and they hooked me up with a trike and Trek Tag a Long to try.  Given I could not go over 8 miles an hour without tipping it and my daughter refused to ride the tag along this tanked quickly. Brian at Outspokin and me both researched other options. There are dual pedal quads that look like golf carts and recumbent tandems and of course the Scandinavian Mobii where it is a bike with a carrier thing with two wheels in the front and you can put two kids in it. It looks way cool. Problem is all these new alternative forms of transport, especially the ones with the rechargeable motors, are outrageously expensive. In the end I went looking for used transport and on EBay found my Monarch Ped E Cab. It was a floor model and is being shipped to me already assembled. I am psyched that I have something that will enhance my independence, look cool, and is safe and environmentally friendly. And of course I am going to trick it out with silver streamers, a disco ball and cool decals. You will see us coming (so you don’t run us over). A big thanks also to Outspokin for all their help.

As the ways we communicate have changed over the past two years, the ways I communicate have also changed, but in the opposite way. In a sense I am going against the grain. I do not really like to text because it is time consuming and I do not have the time to read what is going on in the Facebook world. I don’t have a smart phone because I cannot see one, so I also do not have access to the web at my fingertips. And I love it. Reducing the flood if information has made my life easier and at the same time my visual impairment has also forced me to pick up the phone and talk to people more. My preference and primary form of communication is through conversation. As I have moved more to phone conversations I find that sometimes it takes a while to get people conditioned to calling me back instead of trying to communicate via texting. But I notice that some do eventually start picking up the phone to communicate. At first I thought that not having the ability or time to text and e-mail and use social media left me in the cold. But, actually the opposite has occurred. If I care enough about you to want to know you or know what is going on in your world I, eventually, will pick up the phone. Because of this I not only know who my friends are, but my friendships have deepened because I am really connecting with people.  Those who use text or e-mail as a primary means of communication in building or maintaining relationships must be at a loss in really being able to connect.

At the same time the visual impairment has left me unable to read people because I can’t see facial expressions. It means I get no feedback about how people are reacting to what I say or if they are even making eye contact and attending. I can’t read if people are being sincere or authentic or sarcastic because that is often shown in the face and not in the tone of voice. I do not know when someone is looking at me or gesturing from a distance. It has made me aware of how much communication is done via eye contact and nods or other small gestures and signs in the face, all of which I can no longer see.   If I am with someone and meet or see a person I have to rely on the friend to describe a reaction, or tell me if someone was looking at me or seemed engaged or even annoyed (I do have a somewhat sarcastic sense of humor). I think the inability to see facial expression hurts me in social interaction, facilitation and especially in trying to meet new people. And I am not sure how to get around it. My heightened sense of hearing and other senses don’t really assist me in this task. My strategy now is to just smile a lot and seem approachable and listen as much as I can to tone and inflection of the voice, and my brain’s new ability to try and fill in the gaps in faces. I think about how much I wish I could hold someone’s gaze and understand what they are feeling. I wonder, in this new age of communication where we are disconnected, if we are not teaching our kids how to have a conversation, then we are also not teaching them how to read non-verbal behavior. How can you read people if you can’t see them or even if you are with them you are looking down at your phone? The loss of the ability to have conversations and all that it entails will create a society that is just about being heard or people knowing what you are doing, instead of knowing each other. And that is a sad thing.  

Keep Moving Forward,

Beth (BLOVI) Medlock