The Adventures of The Blind/Low Vision/Visually Impaired (BLOVI) Girl- Volume 28
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=nXcI0G6m-Ew
This week I am going to write about the process I am going through in considering moving to a new city. After 20 years in Columbia, I feel I need a change and it raises the questions of why, what is to be gained and what is to be lost. Why choose to go through another major life change? But first………..
My WTF of the week is the fact that I sustained my first injury from running. This is proof that my body is breaking down in my middle age. I thought I had overstretched my Achilles but realized I just aggravated an old sprain. So after icing and wrapping it for a few days, I started gradually running on it again with it wrapped and wearing a more supportive shoe. A week later I was back to running 5 miles with it taped and in my lovely running socks. So maybe it is a little swollen, but it does not hurt, so I will continue running until something else breaks down or I wince in pain. Because that seems to be the smart thing to do, right?
This week I can’t get enough of the fact that I am putting myself out there for public consumption. I finally, with the help of my assistant, wrote to the producers of the Oprah show and OWN to talk about why my story is worthy of some screen time. If you would like to see me on the OWN, you can also suggest that I would make a good guest on a show. The more e-mails they get about me, the more they will think that my story is newsworthy. I mean how many people kill their retinas with exercise bands. I may even consider having incentives for people to write in about me. Name your price. I could be on Gayle’s show, but I am thinking it would be cool to be on Dr. Oz. He could do a show on vision, optical health and the fact that macular degeneration, which also causes the retinas to die, is a growing issue because of our aging population or he could talk about wearing eye protection. I have an ulterior motive for being on that show. If I get on there I will personally refute some of the things he said about what happens to women over 40 where in one case a dried out sponge was used as an example. Man, that was scary. I am also looking into getting an agent who could help me get in front of more people to do speaking engagements as a motivational (or just a little hyper) speaker. I have also decided it would be cool to see if I could model. I am the sample size for the first time in my life and am tall enough and I have been told there is work for women in their 40’s, and not just in Depends ads and talking about menopause (hopefully). It will be interesting to see what happens. I could just be fooling myself with all of this, but it is worth a shot. And I actually got the modeling idea after seeing that Alex “I found my voice” McCord of the NYC Housewives was starting a modeling career, so I can’t take credit for that brilliant idea. I also had an idea for a show called “I am blind, what’s your excuse”, but thought people may find that a little offensive.
Lately I have been thinking about making a move from Columbia to Charlotte. I have been in Columbia for 20 years and really did not mean to be here that long. I thought I was going to be here for graduate school and then move somewhere else. But an internship, a job, a consulting business and relationships kept me here. Over the years many of my friends have left for greener pastures. At the end of this month two more of my friends are leaving. As my group of friends here dwindles, I have begun to question why I am still here. I think the main reason is that I and my daughter have family here and a network of support and friends. My daughter, however, seems to be resilient when it comes to friends leaving. When I told her one of her best friends was moving, she wanted to know two things, 1) can we visit him and stay overnight with him and his mom and 2) when he was 16 could he drive to Columbia to see her and have a sleepover. I agreed to everything except the sleepover at 16. And she said “OK that is cool”. So, is it cool for me to leave friends and family behind?
In reality, Charlotte is not that far away (about 1.5 hours) so we could have lots of visitors (especially if I move anywhere near the Trader Joe’s). I already have some friends there and can begin to build new support networks. And the timing seems right. My daughter will transition into the first grade and will be changing schools in the fall of 2012 and I had also planned to put my house on the market. I can do my life coaching business from anywhere and Charlotte is a bigger market for customers and for speaking and modeling if I go that route. There are great schools in the neighborhood in which I would like to live-two public Montessori’s within walking distance, one in which my friend is the school psychologist.
Even though Columbia is slowly becoming a somewhat more interesting place to live (could I have used more qualifiers), it still lacks the metropolitan and cosmopolitan feel that I grew up in and that I long for. I also would love a better transportation system, more choices in live music, art and plays, and a neighborhood where I could walk or run to stores, eating places, etc. given that I cannot drive. Although I can do that somewhat now, there are places in Charlotte that are even more convenient and where there are stores where I can get vintage clothing and indulge my mid-century modern fetish.
So why is the decision to leave so hard and so scary, and does my visual impairment have anything to do with it. It goes without saying it will be difficult to leave family and friends and our support network. Of course, there is the selling of my house in this market or the leasing of it and who really wants to do that. And then packing, which is always a nightmare and even more so now that I can’t see to sort through what stays and what goes. Then I have to make trips back and forth to Charlotte to look for housing and at schools and have to rely on others to make those trips. Then there is the issue of whether I will really be able to judge the adequacy of a new space. Then there is the issue of meeting new people and establishing a support network which includes a network of drivers. Lastly, there is the big issue-I have to get my ex-husband’s permission to cross state lines and may not be able to do that. If I could drive I could live over the state line in SC but that is not a possibility for me because of the lack of public transportation and walkable communities. So, my visual impairment is a very big issue when it comes to my ability to relocate.
But the great thing is I am not moving because I have to, because I am following anyone or because I am unhappy and running away from something. And that actually makes the decision harder. I would be moving to somehow make our quality of life better and if that could really happen is a gamble. So I am pondering this decision slowly and carefully, and it may take more than a year to make it. But that is OK; I am happy where I am right now and have plenty of time to make changes in my life. As do we all!
Keep Moving Forward,
Beth (BLOVI) Medlock
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