The Adventures of the Blind/Low Vision/Visually Impaired (BLOVI) Girl-Volume 22
This week in my blog I am going to talk about my ideas for two lines of t-shirts, one is a BLOVI Girl line and the other is a casual relationship line. I want to also let you know that my blog has moved to http://www.theadventuresoftheblovigirl.blogspot.com/ or you can go on blogger.com and look it up. But first………………
My WTF of the week is this commercial I saw on TV that was advertising for a new non-stimulant medication for ADHD. Medication commercials are hilarious in general because they have to talk about all the side effects (my favorite’s reference stools). But this one is particularly funny. First they have a teacher talking about kids in the classroom who can’t focus or pay attention and then she says my child is one of those. They know you are going to think that if a teacher would give this drug to her own kid, then it must be great. But the medications effects are what are fantastic. The first side effects are tiredness and fatigue, and being tired or sleepy is mentioned again later in the ad. . So instead of your child not being able to focus in class, they will just be asleep and drooling on the desk. Then they go on to say that people taking the drug should not drive or operate machinery. That is a real bonus because who would want their 8 year old trying to drive a forklift. Especially one with ADHD who is not paying attention at all to what he is doing. That could really cause some damage. It is so refreshing to see that we are again inventing new medications to make kids in the classroom manageable, this time by just knocking them out. And hey, since it is a non-stimulant, those without ADD or ADHD can’t crush it up and snort it. There goes the extra money for downloading from ITunes or video games.
This week I can’t get enough of my new Flip video camera. With my easy to use camera I can record and have videos up in a flash. My only complaint is that there should be an “over 40” lighting button you can press that puts that fuzzy halo of light around to soften things up. But, alas it does not so you just have to make sure you are well lit. I also have this cool tripod that is bendable and flexible. When I bought it the guy said you can wrap the ends around the limb of a tree above a birds nest and film the mother bird feeding her babies. I was thinking, I don’t think that is the kind of wood that some people would think to wrap the tripod around for interesting angles, but I actually managed to not say that aloud. I decided to put more videos up on my YouTube Channel (LBDCoaching) when I realized that my promotional video had received almost 900 views. And you can get all these interesting statistics about who watched your video. I was shocked to learn that the largest demographic viewing my video was males ages 13 to 17. When my videographer asked how long I thought they watched the video, I said probably about two minutes. I should be proud; I have captured one of the primary groups targeted by the ad and movie industries. Still, it is a little creepy. So every week two new clips will be up; a coaching tip of the week and a video blog that is a short description of the BLOVI blog for that week. The video blog will be on the BLOVIGirl YouTube site. I will try to change up my outfits, hair and backdrops so you don’t get bored. I also love my running socks. They really disturb other people, who have called them primitive and apelike. When I was running with a friend some people called out “here come the Vinrum ladies. I kind of like that because I have been called much worse.
I am a big fan of the witty one liner. So, many times I come up with things I would like to put on t-shirts (or mugs or underwear). After watching Kathy Griffin I was reminded that she had some good t-shirts and if she could have them, why couldn’t I. My first line of t-shirts will be the BLOVI girl line. Of course I will have the ubiquitous “Team BLOVI Girl” as well as common sayings like “BLOVI Girls do it better”. Here are some of my other t-shirts.
1) If you can read this t-shirt, then I can see you
2) I get BLOVI’d every week
3) I am not groping you, it’s just my way of saying Hi
4) Just because I can’t see you doesn’t mean I can’t hear you
5) Get out of my way, I can’t see sh*t
6) I am visually impaired, what’s your excuse?
7) I am a spotter for the BLOVI Girl, now turn around
8) Now is your chance to lie about your looks
My second line of t-shirts is what I am calling my Casual relationship line. Since no one will approach me and I really don’t like texting or e-mail, I decided these t-shirts would be a quick and easy way to communicate my, and of course, your interests while in public places. I guarantee they will be a conversation starter. I have also decided that at this stage in my life I am allowed to talk about having casual relationships and make no apologies for it. As we all know, “girls just want to have fun”. If you are easily offended or under the age of 18, I would stop reading here. So, here are my t-shirts.
1) I like you, just for tonight
2) I have an early morning meeting
3) I don’t want to be your Facebook Friend
4) My friendship comes with an optional benefits package
5) Please allow me to rock your world
6) I like going “South of the border”
7) I am skilled in the art of discretion
8) First name only please
9) Remember, your competition has Energizer batteries
10) Looking for a gay husband
These are just a few of my ideas. Some of my friends came up with ones that were much more risqué, which makes me feel normal. I also thought about some that could be specifically for men to wear with sayings like “I am willing to meet all your needs” and “I love to cook and clean”. And because I actually think they would sell (BLOVI readers, get out your credit cards), I am going to have them made and for sale on the BLOVI blog site by next month.
Next week I will share my experiences trying out EHarmony. Let’s just say it won’t be pretty.
Keep Moving Forward,
Beth (BLOVI) Medlock
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